UPDATED! Way too much information . . . not for the faint-hearted!

Ok . . . why I am compelled to share this? I have no idea. Probably because I just spent 20 minutes laughing (to myself) so hard that it was difficult to remain standing.

First, when you prep for laser hair removal, you have to shave everywhere that you want the laser to remove hair. They recommend that you have help in order to gain perfect symmetry. Well, J has been gone for 9 days, so he is no help! There's no way I would ask anyone else (aren't y'all glad of that?)

It's a slippery slope, I tell ya. A little from this side to even it up, then a little from the other. I'd venture to guess that a lot of women get a lot more bare than their original intention. Not that I would know or anything. Just an educated guess!

Then you have the application of a numbing cream. Um, down there. In the girly-bit region. I'm thinking I could have just gone to my next-door neighbor (who sells for Passion Parties) and bought some of her numbing cream, thereby saving myself the embarrassment of having the pharmacist "consult" with me about the specific use. And the numbing? Really a bit more like burning.

The final fun came in the form of the SARAN WRAP DIAPER. Learn from me, people! If you think SARAN WRAP is sometimes tough to use when covering the salad bowl? Try fashioning a diaper, ON YOURSELF, when covered in numbing cream. Just try it. It's good fun!

And yes, if you were wondering, I do make noise when I walk. A lot of noise. Won't be running errands on the way to the treatment center!

OK, I am back, with an update of my soon-to-be hairless coochie experience, for all to enjoy!

First off, I countered the cellophane noise by wearing nylon track pants - I am one smart cookie! But I still didn't stop to run errands! A note for future experiences with Saran Wrap . . . always leave a pull tab . . . a place to start the unraveling process. Because, combined with the numbness, it was difficult to unwrap the sticky goodness.

Second, and most importantly, when choosing your treatment, you may opt for "bikini" which is hair outside of the fold of your leg. Or you may opt for "total bikini" which is anything more. What I did not recall ever discussing or choosing is "designated parts of bikini area AND THE CRACK OF MY ASS." But apparently I did make that choice. Not enough numbing cream in the world for that one, ladies. Holy crap. I managed to mumble the (really) bad words into the pillow, but geez, Louise! It hurt! Plus, I was feeling a little cheap! Here I paid her, I'm on my hands and knees, she's all up in my business and I don't even get a nice night on the town? Or a cigarette when it was over? That girl touched parts of me that shouldn't be touched, just so yah know! (Actually she was uber-professional and I really like her, so I guess that's a good thing when someone is really "into" you with a laser.)

I do think it will be worth it, I really do. And this was the worst of it, I think. I hope. Next time, I'll be sure to apply the good 'ole cream to even the most hidden bits. 'Cuz those were the spots that hurt the worst!

The Middle Finger . . .

is much better, thank you! It is still a slight shade of purple, but altogether MUCH better than I thought it would be!

So I had a lovely breakfast with my good friend, K, this morning. I just adore her (hi, K!). She has walked through some really hard things in the last few years,but I am so proud of the growth and strength that she has found. She is working her way through nursing school - and doing an amazing job of it. All the while, she's balancing and cherishing the lives of her three children. She has more grace and compassion under pressure than anyone else I know. She will make an amazing nurse, I know it! It was nice to be able to connect with her. Life has been a bit too crazy, lately and I REFUSE to lessen my grasp on my girlfriends. They have been so important to me over the last several years and that will not change, love-of-my life or not!

I also was able to connect with our favorite babysitter and friend, L, tonight, albeit by phone. She's away at school and we are missing her so much. She is like a little sister to me and I can't wait for her to come home for spring break! D, who has the memory of an elephant, had to call and remind her that she owes him $1 for some silly bet they made last June. I told L that she'd better come with it held over her head like a white flag when she arrives!

J will be up in on Wednesday and I am so ready. I get used to him being here, helping and taking some of the load off of me . . . then he goes and I get overwhelmed! So I will be relieved when he arrives. Plus, we're going to church for Ash Wednesday as a family and I'm excited to start the Easter season together. It's hard to worship without him each week.

Speaking of Easter, D has decided to give up something for Lent. Not his Gameboy. Or his Gamecube, or God forbid, chicken and fries. But maybe his allowance. Or fudgesicles. But he's not sure yet! He cracks me up! But he is very serious about the whole deal. And doesn't want any suggestions about what would be appropriate to sacrifice, that's for sure!

And I am going into tomorrow to make a sacrifice . . . of body hair that is! Tomorrow is the big day that I get to slather myself in lidocaine gel, wrap Saran-wrap around myself in a diaper-like fashion, wear tight underwear and preferably bike shorts (sorry - don't have any!) and go for my laser hair removal. Wooo-hoooo! A lot of pain and $$$$! I am excited! (But talk to me in the summer, when I can slap on a bikini over my ever-thickening body and only worry about the exposed fat . . . exposed hair - not an issue!) Wish me luck!

And can someone please shut the frogs up, for the love of Pete? My girlfriend, JS, could hear them over the phone, for crimony sakes! (Hi, JS!)

Ouch!

My finger versus the closet door . . . guess who won?

Back to Coronado

So last Saturday, woke up, had breakfast delivered to our room. We wandered down to the beach for our photos with Carey (my CD still hasn't arrived in the mail and I'm getting impatient to print and play). It was so much fun to have those taken. We wandered around "downtown" Coronado and headed back to the hotel with a pizza in hand to enjoy our balcony. It actually was warm enough to put on swimsuits and get a little sun. I got a little too much sun - but it felt awesome. J had something up his sleeve, slipped off on his own for a while and came back telling me to be ready at 2:45. He walked me down a little pathway to massage studio where he had booked me for a massage and facial. I argued that it was HIS birthday, but there was no turning him! So I enjoyed probably the best massage of my life. I think she did a great job, but it was also the fact that he had given it to me and the beautiful surroundings of Coronado and the relaxed weekend. I actually drifted off a couple of times during the massage!

It was funny because she commented on my skin being beautiful. I have been in and out of the dermatologist office for the last 7 years, trying to get my hormones to stop wrecking havoc on my face. I have noticed a huge improvement over the last few months since I have been using Arbonne skincare products. Nothing else in my life has made such an impact! Email my (ex-sister-in-law, who is married to the brother of my gay ex-husband) sister, Jessica at order_arbonne@yahoo.com if you want to know more. (Yes, that qualifies as a shameless plug - but I wouldn't do it if I didn't believe in the product and believe in her. I have also been using Bare Escentials makeup and I can't say enough about how great it looks on me. Love it!

So, after my fabulous massage/facial, we went down to the beach, with a hat on my head, trying to disguise the oiliness that was my post-massage hair. We watched the sunset and then headed back to the hotel. On the way, we encountered two things that noticeably shifted the mood. One had to do with a man who was incapacitated and relying on his wife/caregiver for assistance. J had something to say along the lines of, if that ever happens to me, pull the plug because I wouldn't want to be a burden to you. We argue the definition of burden and I tucked away the comment for later digestion. Then we see the bride who had just gotten married in front of the Del. She was in a very plain, white satin dress. It wasn't my favorite, but J had to say how much he disliked plain wedding dresses and that I wouldn't be married in one. WTF? It all broke loose then. His defense? "Well, I haven't done this before . . . " which I took as a direct jab at the fact that I have been married before. So by the time we reached our beautiful room, I was teary and pissed and all-around annoyed. (In my defense, I had started my period that morning . . . .)

So we talked through it. I told him how it made me feel. He recanted and better explained the statements and we got ready for dinner. We walked down to a Thai restaurant and ended up with a table in the bar. Just before our food arrived, we entered into a discussion about having children with developmental disabilities. And it was all over, ladies and gentlemen. He made a statement. I responded. He didn't/wouldn't hear the response. I didn't/wouldn't hear his intent. A downward spiral occurred so fast, that I was in the bathroom in tears before I knew what had happened. It was ugly. With a capital U - Ugly. Didn't eat much and got back to the hotel. I had to cry it out on the bathroom floor before we could discuss it rationally. And we did. We worked through it. And although I hated that the discussion/misunderstanding/argument intruded on our beautiful weekend, I can say how much closer I feel to him for having walked thorough it. Each time we work through something like that, we end up more tightly woven. And stronger. But man, did it suck to get there!

Then, we decide to go down to the hot tub. And ignore the "No Glass" rule. So J hid the bottle of champagne under his robe. And accidentally dropped it on the marble staircase. Whoops. Glass and champagne EVERYWHERE! It was made worse because it was the champagne that he had given me for Valentine's Day. I had to physically stop him from going and finding a replacement bottle. We relaxed a bit n the hot tub and then came back up for bed. Our feet stuck to the marble as we came up the stairs - that was some sticky champagne! I had to take the photo of J sitting by the "wet floor" sign. I know the staff thought we were nutso!


My headache started right about then. Followed quickly by nausea. Luckily, J is a traveling pharmacy and has something to at least take away my nausea. Zofran (sp?) is a good thing! I didn't sleep well and woke up knowing that it would get worse. We did have a great morning, even though I was a bit compromised with the headache/migrain that was slowly taking over my persona. We wandered through the shops at the Del and ended up on their sundeck with a glass of wine before leaving for the airport.

Long and sordid story made short . . . Southwest had some issues. We were very late after multiple attempts to get home on alternate flights. By the time we landed, I felt badly enough that J wouldn't;t let me drive. So he called his Commander and basically said that he wouldn't be at the base in eh morning, as requested. That he would get there when he could in the afternoon. So instead of putting me in a rental car and sending me on my way, J drove me home. We had progressed from over-the-counter meds by that point and nothing was helping. By the time we got home, I was cross-eyed. He took care of D and sent me to bed. I ended up asking an expired Vicodin and passing out.

I felt slightly better by Monday morning, although it literally took me almost four days to truly be over the headache. It was all hormones, probably driven a bit by our argument on Saturday night. Hopefully, if this new Nuva-Ring works (which is weird, I tell ya . . . weird! It reminds me of those jelly bracelets we used to wear in the 80's. Except, well, floating in my who-ha), then my hormones will even out and I will be sane. Please, Jesus, please!

So that was our jolly trip to Coronado. Awesome, but very real time spent together. Each experience reaffirms my heart for him. I am so amazingly grateful to have this chance.

Coronado Pics from Saturday - Sunday

Finally Getting Back to It!

So my "later" ended up being "later in the week . . ." Sorry! These past weeks of traveling every weekend have caught up with me. Add to that the major stressing at work and I have not sat down at the computer for anything other than the absolute necessary items! (Such as work and ordering more Bare Escentials - since I can't buy it anywhere north of Sacramento, apparently!) Speaking of Bare Escentials? That stuff is like cocaine! I can never go back to anything else, I am in love with how my skin looks when I use it. It is awesome!

So, let's see, I have more pictures from Coronado, but haven't uploaded them to Flickr. We've been busy! Tuesday night we went to see my Grandpa, who was re-admitted to extended care after just five days at home. Wednesday during the day, I had to take Dylan out of school and to the Outpatient Center to have the large chunk or lead and wood removed from his right palm. Wednesday night we went to dinner with my Dad who left today for three weeks. I worked in Redding today and we just got home. So, since we are going down to Travis AFB to stay the night with J tomorrow, I'd better be doing some laundry and oh, I don't know, maybe vacuuming the house? Since it's been so long!

But it's more fun to blog and consider how and when my J is going to officially ask me to marry him! I mean, crap! It's been 8 weeks, what's a girl gotta do to get a ring around here! He has gone from not wanting to even talk about a ring to asking me today what caret size I wanted? What the heck? Then he was stressing about next Saturday, about going to Napa and making sure I could leave at a certain and in general, wiggin out about it! Now, he's freaking out about the 15th of March. Freaking out. I have no idea what he has up his sleeve. But it's definitely something!

$350 a night and well-worth it!

I NEVER thought I'd say this, but I paid $350 per night (off-season) for our room . . . and it was worth every penny! Our suite was lovely. We had a large balcony that overlooked the pool and the bay. The bed was huge (we're getting one of those!) and fluffy. The history behind the hotel was amazing. We loved it and will find an excuse to go back sooner, rather than later. The staff was fantastic. They went so far above and beyond good service (and I have HIGH standards) that I cannot even describe it!

We got to the airport and I finally told J that he could guess where we were going. I had him believing that we were going to Palm Springs. He believed that until we walked by that gate . . . I couldn't hide it any longer once we got to the correct gate. He warned me to not tell the flight crew that it was his birthday - said he wouldn't sit by me if I did. Well, it was a full flight, where else was he going to sit? So everyone sang and the SW crew made him a "cake" out of a toilet

We took a taxi to Coronado. Once we checked in and had walked through the suite, he started to get a little, um . . . frisky. I had to tell him to tone it down for a few minutes and he was like, "Why? Come on baby, it's my birthday . . . " Right then, there's a knock at the door and I open it to three staff members coming in with a gorgeous cake and full champagne service. They set it all up on the balcony, I gave him his card and it was a perfect moment. Perfect! And the cake? Was unbelievable!

We spent a little time in the suite, wink, wink . . . and then headed to the beach to watch the sunset. We got cleaned up and had a phenomenal dinner at an Italian place just down the street. J had steak & lobster - done perfectly. Desert, wine . . . everything was great! We walked back in the rain (we started the relationship in the rain, so it was a good reminder) and had an awesome night!

We woke up to a huge downpour at about 4:00 am. Went back to sleep and then woke to brilliant sunshine, which meant that our photo session was still on! We had our continental breakfast in the suite and then headed to the beach. Here is the link to the beach photos. Use the drop-down menu and choose Amy & John, then the password is younglove . . . she'll mail me the CD will full-resolution images this week and then I'll get to have some fun with them! http://barefoot-memories.com/OnlineOrdering/

Ok, that's pretty much it through Saturday morning, I'll finish up with the rest of the (mentionable) details and photos later.

Leaving on a Jet Plane . . .

So we're heading out of here in a little bit. I am still not packed, by the way. The weather report is now calling for rain all weekend. So we are going to Coronado. To stay in an incredibly expensive room. And watch the rain. Happy Birthday, my J! (Of course, from a man's perspective, being rained in all weekend is probably not a bad thing. I'm just thinking that we could have been rained in somewhere cheaper.)

Have a great weekend. I will update on Monday. Hopefully, I will have some great beach photos of my beloved and I. The photographer is still hopeful that it will be cloudy and dry. I can DO cloudy and dry!

Unpacking to Pack Again

With all of the intense counseling that I'd have, you would think that it might have actually stopped some of my OCD and controlling behaviors. But no. Now I keep doing them, but label and analyze them on my way! Where is the fun in that?

I organized my bathroom cabinets at 10:00 pm last night. Organized as in, threw away a huge bag of makeup and products, WASHED MY BARE ESCENTIALS BRUSHES, lined up the freakin' nail polish by shades, etc. The nail polish, by the way . . . should be thrown out as well, because since I started going to Dawn almost a year ago for pedicures? I haven't touched a bottle of the stuff. Let's assume it is all bad and throw it out too! (Although it looks so nice, all lined up by shades . . .)

Did I pack my bag? In fact, have I completely unpacked from last weekend? NO! Did I pack D's bag since he is staying at my Mom's? NO! Did I clean the bathroom? NO! All of those things would be necessary. But, nope, the wacko in me comes out and begins to do the unnecessary. Oh, and my Valentine booklet for J? I decided I didn't like it. So I put together 4 pages for an 8x8 scrapbook. Because what else should I be doing at 10:00pm on a Wednesday night?

That being said, I need to get in the shower. Maybe I can clean it while I'm in there! I mean, really, I have an hour before I need to have D in the car on the way to school . . . plenty of time!

Valentine's Day Surprise Visit

You may know (or you may not) that I abhor Valentine's Day. It is fraught with unrealistic expectations and too many men crowding the supermarket lines at 5:15 trying to get a little love for their wives in the form of a badly packaged and overpriced dozen roses. Where is the creativity in that, I ask? So I told J last week that I would not be dealing with the big V-day on the 14th since he was at work and we'd be in he midst of our trips. He agreed. I am putting together a cute little digital book for him, from Heather Ann Designs, http://www.heatheranndesigns.com/description_10_things.shtml and a few other little things to give him on Thursday when he comes up.

So what does he do? Totally one-ups me and shows up at my house last night. We had flown separately into Sacramento and then met up for a quick dinner on the river. D and I came home, and J had to get some stuff done at his place. Next thing I know, he's at my door with beautiful pink roses and a bottle of my favorite champagne http://www.wine.com/wineshop/product_detail.asp?PProduct_ID=SWS41175_0&Nu=p_family_name! How am I supposed to be mad at him? Even though he is exhausted and has to work a twelve hour shift at noon? How can I be mad a man that drives 1.5 hours for me after just barely getting off the plane from our little Texas trip? He is amazing!

So I got D to school with his bag full of Valentines and candy. Brought a hot chocolate home for J (and a big latte for me), got him in the shower and then out the door (sadly). I jumped into work and he made it to Sacramento safely.

I did have a major find for our trip this weekend. I decided, while on the plane yesterday, that I would love to have beach photos of us. So I posted on twopeas and got some responses from area photographers. Then I decided to try, on the off chance, to see if Tara Whitney was available. Amazingly, she was. But then, when I realized that I was actually considering spending $800 for beach pictures? J would have killed me! And even I couldn't justify that! With wedding photos in our near future, I just couldn't make that one fly - even to myself!

So then someone sent me a link to another area photographer, who just happened to be doing a mini-session event ACROSS THE STREET FROM OUR HOTEL on Saturday. http://www.barefoot-memories.com/ She had an opening at 11:00 and I booked it. Paid for. Done deal. And I am so excited. I think J will be also. Although he'll complain about it a bit (having to get up, get dressed, etc.), he'll love having those pictures. Now if he'd just pack the ring and have it in hand in front of the photographer? That would be some excellent proposal mojo! (It's not going to happen, but a girl can dream!)

Considering that I have to work at school until noon tomorrow, work in my Redding office after that, and then finish with a District meeting at 7:00 in Cotttonwood? I ought to get off my booty and either get something done around here, or go to bed!

Oh, and speaking of my booty? I am starting Weight Watchers on Monday. Online point calculater, here I come!

Photos

Home again . . .

I hate learning things about myself! REALLY!
1. I like to be in control.
2. When I feel out of control, I might get a little bitchy.
3. When given the opportunity to eat, I will. Even if I am not hungry in the slightest.
4. When I eat a lot of crap, I get fat and bloated.
5. When stressed, I take it out on the people I love the most.
6. I crave being at home, doing "my thing" . . . whatever that means.
7. When I can't do "my thing" "my way" I am not always very nice.
8. When in a pinch (as in pulling a "C" card for boarding on Southwest), I have no problem saying that I'm pregnant for pre-boarding. There I said it. So sue me! It's hard to travel alone with a child, even when he is the world's most experienced traveler and does an amazing job of transfers, exchanging local currency and trying local cuisine. Waiting in line for an hour for an unassigned seat? Lame.
9. I still put a lot of pressure on myself to be a perfect mother, future daughter-in-law and wife-to-be.
10. I am so tied to my routine that I cannot poop when traveling. Especially when traveling with my intended.
11. I miss the everyday basics of my life. I missed certain worship songs this morning when I missed church.
12. I can still worship. even if it is with a cognizant change of my selfish attitude or with the help of iTunes at 11:10 pm.
13. I am blessed beyond measure and need to learn how to infiltrate that into my every breath.

Blogging from the Lone Star State

So the weekend is winding down. D is asleep. J is in the shower. J's Mom and Stepdad have returned home. As have his sister and BIL. We are spending our last night here on the north runway of the San Antonio airport. But it has been good. Lots of family time - but that's what we came for. J's family is lovely. Very kind people.

We have eaten and been in the car more than I care to admit. But I had genuine Texas BBQ. And Joe's Crab Shack and numerous other meals.

And we saw countless animals from the Saharian plains. Really. I'll explain and add pictures on Tuesday.

But we're doing well. Missing the puppies, my Mama and Gram. We'll fly home tomorrow and get ready for the short week. J and I leave for his birthday weekend on Friday. I work in Redding on Wednesday. It's going to be crazy~ See ya'll soon!

Packing for Texas

So I'm working, doing laundry and trying to pull it together! I haven't been sleeping well this week and I am exhausted! So ideally, I will have our bags packed and at the door by 8:00 this evening and can do my thing, relax and get to bed early. Because I am getting a bit crabby!

I went in for some more blood work. The assumption at this point is that I've had (a) an ovarian cyst rupture, (b) am ovulating - although being that I am on massive hormonal birth control I SHOULDN'T BE and (c) have endometriosis. The doctor wanted to do a laproscopic look-see yesterday to confirm it. Um, no thanks! We'll wait on that one. The blood work is just to rule out any type of infection that I may be experiencing and which would be more emergent that the above-mentioned conglomerate of causes!

So, if I don't post again until Tuesday it's because I'm flying to the great state of Texas. To meet my future Mother-in Law. So if I'm not posting again by Wednesday or Thursday? Come looking for me!

Just a thought . . . surprise me with comments while I'm gone. Come on!

Funny vomit story (not mine, thank goodness!)

For those that know my worst-ever vomiting story, you may understand why I laughed so hard that tears and snot streamed down my face while reading this . . .

http://www.fluidpudding.com/


Plus, I just got home from BURNEY and am tired and a wee bit wacked.

Wednesday Update

So, Monday went on it's merry way . . . I ended up at the doctor's office with severe pelvic pain. Two ultrasounds later, and we still don't know what's going on! It looks like I ruptured an ovarian cyst on the right side. So I'm having pain on the left side, why? J got a bit (ha!) concerned and hopped in the truck at the end of his shift Monday night and was here by 1:30 am. He's more over-reactive to this than I am. It's interesting to see him as a medical practicioner be completely unable to distance himself and treat me like a patient. If I was some random patient in the ER? He would be all about letting time sort it out, etc. With me? Not so much!

(And I'm only disclosing this on my blog because J has apparently already told his whole family about my girlie issues.) To one-up him for inappropriate disclosure? In talking with my OB/GYN yesterday and discussing the fact that we'd like to try for a baby in a year or so? My doctor offered to let J get his sperm sample "out of the way" so I could go on Clomid without delay if necessary. Needless to say, J declined the opportunity. Ha! That'll teach him!

Nothing like meeting his Mom for the first time and trying to avoid that fact that she knows about my ovaries. Hot dog!

And now, drumroll, please . . . I am going to Burney. To make a presentation to the Fire District and various other Boards.

Wish me luck, because quite frankly, I feel like someone is taking my Fallopian tube and tying it in a knot, then stepping on it. With a big boot worn by an obese man. (Who knew that fallopian is supposed to be capitalized? Not me!)

Still no comments? Come on, people, just say something to the tune of, "Hi Amy. Sorry about your ouchy Fallopian tube. My name is Betty and live in Timbucktoo." Or "Hi Amy. It's your mother/best friend/neighbor and frankly, I think this qualifies as TMI!"

Ok, seriously . . . comments, people!

You're here. Comment. Just say hi - let me know who is here! Please? End of rant. (Unless you are an ex. Then I don't want to know.)

That's One Way to Relax

Ah, a long day at school . . . now I get to kick it on the floor with my video iPod? Serious relaxation for a first grader!

Conflicted . . .

So my stomach is really upset. I am sure that it's just too much stuff going on, but it's bothering me nonetheless. I feel overwhelmed by the entire idea of buying a home. It makes me want to crawl back under the covers and hide until the thought goes away. I've never been super responsible when it comes to finances. I'm having a hard time with it right now.

I feel like such a loser that I come to the table with literally nothing to offer. I feel really ashamed and it makes it hard for me to talk calmly through it with J. I know, that in theory, I have had my plate REALLY full for the last 8 years. I know that when I had D, I was in debt up to my eyeballs and was making $24K a year as a teacher. I was spending all that I had and more. Instead of shifting that habit around when I began to make more, I simply began to spend more. So why am I so afraid to handle money responsibly? I have a long-time habit of developing budgets that I don't follow. I'm the only one to blame. Now that there is so much at stake, I'm scared.

I really want his help in all of this. In all honesty, I want him to handle it. Period. Give me a freakin' allowance - I don't care! (Saying that, I realize how archaic it sounds, and I know how hard that would be for me, but still . . . ) I just want to help him fulfill his wildest dreams for our family and I'm afraid that I'm too much of a risk in that area. It sucks, big time.

Added to the financial shit, I found out today that a long-time family friend has had a relapse with her ovarian cancer. She is a woman that has already dealt with way too much shit in her life. And she's done it with the most grace and kindness ever imaginable. Their family deserves so much more than this.

It must be Monday.

Whoops, I Got to Rambling!

So yesterday I alluded to a date night . . . we had one, ladies and gentlemen; indeed we did!

Friday night, my Mom kept D while J and I went to dinner (5th Street), a movie (Glory Road) and wine/dessert (Christian Michael's). We had a great time . . . talked some wedding ideals, even though I had previously stated that I would not - until there was a ring on my finger. We also talked through some of our communication style issues (we're both opinionated, blunt, and slightly defensive) And articulate. It's always good to be articulate when you're any combination of blunt, opinionated and defensive!

The super cool thing about J and I is that we've probably talked through more "issues" in the last five weeks than I EVER have with anyone else. We've had lots of firsts with each other - most of them center around trust-type situations, and levels of comfort. I don't worry that he sees me when I roll out of bed. Or when I am tired and lame. Or tired and bitchy. Which has happened on occasion. But at the same time, I LOVE that he took D to my Mom's on Friday night so that I could get ready and meet him at the door, like a real date. I want to keep that as a priority in future date nights. I don't want to be shaving my legs and talking with him while he's on the toilet - ever - let alone on a date night! I want to keep some element of mystery and seduction, even in the midst of the normalcy that we're striving towards. That being said, the shirt I wore, was WAY too low-cut. Serious boobage was spilling over. I found myself pulling my sweater together whenever I could. Whoops.

Oh. And all of the dating goodness? Was capped off by me falling asleep - deeply asleep - within a few minutes of arriving home. Nice move. But what can I say? Apparently, I was very tired and relaxed!

Sunshine, Foothills and a Date Night?

What a great day we had yesterday. It was a beautiful day - a much needed break from the many days of rain and cold. We took D to school and the dogs to the vet, and then headed out to look at neighborhoods and homes for sale. Nothing really struck our fancy (although we found something that we both liked tonight), but it was a great way to spend some time together and talk through likes and dislikes, wants and dreams, etc.

Had a funny (not really funny ha-ha, more a not-really-funny) conversation about Peter. I had called him a couple of days before to talk to him about his subdivision and the newest phase of construction. We talked a couple of times in the last few days - always when I was with J. Peter called yesterday morning to ask me about developmental milestones for children because he was registering H for kindergarten and couldn't remember some of the major milestone dates. When I got off the phone, I asked J if it bothered him that I had been talking with Peter. He said, "no, since you don't have any history with him." Of course, I turned bright red and said, "well, actually . . . " So we agreed that I wouldn't see Peter without J. Which I wouldn't want to anyway. I explained that his girls meant a lot to me and that we had worked hard to find a friendship after our BRIEF dating experience. J understands, and I understand how it would make me feel if the shoe were on the other foot.

We grabbed D from school and went to lunch. Ran a couple of errands and then headed up into Upper Park. We had a great time hiking around and enjoying the beautiful day. Funny coincidence (of course), but while we're at the top of the ridge, who do we see? Peter's ex-wife, her new guy and H. I introduce everyone around, we have some awkward conversation and we're on our way, not before H clings to me for 5 minutes. It has to be hard for J to see someone that I have some type of connection with at every turn. Speaking of . . .

I needed to register D for baseball this morning. We were all going to go, then decided I'd just run out to save time and hassle. I didn't;t realize that it was Minor try-outs today. So who is there? M. He sees me, I see him . . . and we both just choose to ignore each other! It makes me sad, but there's really nothing that I can say or do. Half of me is glad that J wasn't;t with me, just to avoid hurting M. The other part of me thinks that maybe it would help M to realize that people merge lives when they date! Hello? Seven months of back and forth with M and we were still content to see each other a few times a month? And he thinks that normal? Yikes!

Anyway, J is still here and D has a friend over for a sleepover, so I am out of here! More later (as in, after the man of my dreams goes back to Sac to work tomorrow)!